Knowing what you’re up against is vital. I have waited to post this, partially because I as hoping for some resolution, partly because I wanted to give some time for the post about the custody order to be an example of how things can go.
However, for my story, the post about the temporary custody order and the hope it brought for the beginning of repairing my relationship with my child was abruptly halted in less than a week. My ex’s attorney filed an appeal and won on the basis that the judge didn’t have cause to put our child into foster care. Then somehow, after she filed another motion, the entire order got stayed. I wrote a response which was in legal speak not considered relevant. In the end the appellate court lifted the stay on most of the order, keeping a stay on the portion where my ex’s visitation was reduced from 95% to 6 hours every other Saturday. So, now my child is back with her.
I filed a motion with the state supreme court stating that I believe they overstepped their bounds and that the attorney brought up things that were not appropriate for an appeals court (basically trying to smear me again since she had a new audience) but the court denied my request to review it.
I wanted to write something more uplifting but right now I am more than a little disheartened that given that my ex has no defense and that the judge and the two other therapists involved all know she’s the problem, for the moment no one can do anything about it.
Fortunately the judge in my case did say the order was “without prejudice” meaning I can request another hearing without there having to be a major change in the situation to do so. Even so, it means at least a couple more months for the relationship to degrade, for my child to continue to have to be what their mother and family want or else face the consequences, and more time for more tricks from my ex’s lawyer. But I’ll be filing tomorrow, nonetheless. It’s about continuing on no matter what. I think her attorney has gotten the memo that I have no qualms about getting up in her face and I imagine it’s annoying to her that some pro se nothing is causing so much trouble because after all, she’s a managing partner of her firm and this is all about winning.
A friend of mine advised me to keep a journal of what’s been going on so perhaps my child will one day be able to see what I went through in this fight for their soul. I think that’s a good idea all around for anyone—to keep a log of their journey through this. This blog helps me remember what’s happened and I know it will help me remember when one day this dynamic has been changed significantly that in some small way I helped to bring that about.
More updates to come…